Decorum
by Amarissia
Summary: Sephiroth thinks Zack has a few things to learn about proper SOLDIER behavior.  M for yaoi, SephirothZackOther.


_Rated M for yaoi and Sephiroth's underwear._

**DECORUM**

"Zack."

"Hmm?"

"Don't respond with 'hmm'," Sephiroth said, with a touch of impatience. It was one of his little-known pet peeves, mostly because so few would dare say it to him.

"Huh?"

"That's hardly better."

"What is your wish, Mighty Lord of Hotness?"

Sephiroth glared with as much genuine menace as he could summon for his second-in-command; which is to say, not a whole lot. He was far too fond of Zack to get honestly angry, and besides, Zack was used to the 'Sephiroth glare', as he received it so often. The four other 1st Class SOLDIERs seated in the moving transport vehicle were not close enough to hear what the superior officers were whispering, but two of them caught a glimpse of the glare. One of them thanked Gaia he wasn't Commander Fair; the other thought of the stuffed Moogle he kept hidden beneath his bed. And this wasn't even Sephiroth genuinely angry.

The entire point of his irritation was precisely that there were other SOLDIERs present. Not that Zack needed to be told this.

"What? They can't hear me. Listen. Sephiroth is wearing black underwear. I plan to rip it off later."

No noise or head-turning from the other passengers.

"With my teeth. Sephiroth likes to cuddle," Zack continued to murmur, grinning fearlessly. "Cuddle-bug."

"Zackary."

"Bunny-wunny."

"Commander."

"Sephy-wephy."

"I will strangle you."

"But this is fun! More fun than reports, anyway," Zack said glumly, indicating the forms he and Sephiroth had been filling out silently. "You know, normal people wait until a mission is completely over before they start paperwork."

"I am not normal, then."

He said this without emotion, but Zack frowned a little and nudged closer, though they were already side-by-side. It was obvious to everyone at ShinRa that Sephiroth was not like the other SOLDIERs, but Zack was defensive on this point, particularly when Sephiroth or anyone else stated this truth as a negative thing.

"You're special, that's all. Anyway, normal is stupid."

Sephiroth allowed a slight smile. Zack was not terribly poetic, but he always seemed to know the right sentiment to express...unlike himself, who often had trouble seeing feelings that were not obvious.

"We are managing our time effectively. Would you rather sit and do nothing, or have more free time at home?"

"But I'm not good at reports. You think this is detailed enough?"

Sephiroth leaned closer to read the two lines Zack had scribbled so far. "'There was a minor uprising in Kalm. It's pretty ironic, if you think about it.' Somehow I don't think that will suffice."

"Your reports have every single detail, down to the color socks the insurgents were wearing!" Zack complained, pouting. "Why does ShinRa need reports from two officers?"

"To allow for lapses in memory and bias."

"But you don't forget anything, and you don't favor anyone except..."

"All right, all right," Sephiroth said. "I suppose I can assign the secondary report to Hopkins this time."

"You're the best."

"Now we'll have time for the conversation I was trying to initiate earlier." Sephiroth glanced at his watch. "Just barely."

"Okay. Am I in trouble?"

"No. Zack, you know what is expected of a SOLDIER."

"Obedience, loyalty," Zack guessed, "the ability to not get yourself killed?"

"Yes, but there is also a certain style of behavior practiced, in particular by the 1st Class. Myself, for example."

"Yeah, you scare the hell out of everyone."

"Not intentionally," Sephiroth said, adding, "well, not always intentionally."

"You want me to be more intimidating? I'm not sure I can be."

True, fierce fighter though he was, Zack Fair did not strike fear into the heart of anyone but his opponents. His smile was heart-warming, not blood-chilling, and while Sephiroth was for the most part a mysterious loner, Zack was everyone's buddy. Off the battlefield, Zack was lovable and doofy, much younger at heart than his twenty years.

"Perhaps I make a poor example. Look at the behavior of the others in 1st Class. You can disarm any of them, but they are as serious off-duty as they are while on. Your two modes of behavior, on the other hand, are somewhat - "

"Bi-polar?"

"I was going to say contradictory."

"You want me to be different?"

Sephiroth turned away and frowned. He looked pained, and his fists were clenched, and Zack was good at reading people.

"This isn't actually coming from you, isn't it?"

"Rufus." The general rolled his eyes, a rare gesture from him, used only at times of great annoyance. "He claims to have received complaints that 'the childish behavior of Commander Fair undermines the authority and prestige of the SOLDIER program'."

"Donnelly, I bet."

"That would be my guess. He's still bitter about your last promotion. I plan to have a word with him about keeping such things within the unit."

Zack smirked. "Well, don't give him too much alone time. Rank isn't the only reason he's jealous of me."

"I'll keep that in mind."

"So does that mean I don't have to change?"

"A bit more decorum might suit you in the presence of other officers," Sephiroth said, as the vehicle began to pull into the grounds of the ShinRa Compound. "After all, your behavior reflects on those you associate closely with."

"Ha, I think your reputation is firmly in place."

"But I am not the only one," Sephiroth said meaningfully.

"No one knows about that," Zack said, pitching his voice a little lower.

"No one knows the nature of the relationship, true, but they can hardly doubt that one exists."

"I guess I could try to...be calmer," Zack said, though sounding uncertain.

No sooner had he made this vague statement than the vehicle came to a stop and, with an expression of glee that made Sephiroth uneasy, Zack jumped up, bounded to the door and was gone. The other SOLDIERs respectfully waited for the general to go first, and lingered at a discreet distance as Sephiroth paused at the open door and turned back to speak to the driver.

"Arrival, fifteen-hundred hours, sir, exactly on schedule."

"Why did you park here?"

"Sir, Commander Fair requested prior to departure that I get him as close to the Main Quad as possible. Is this a problem, sir?"

"No. Carry on."

Sephiroth stepped onto the familiar ground of the ShinRa Compound and nodded curtly at the salutes of the officers he passed. Thanks to his superior eyesight, he easily caught sight of Zack running toward the outdoor area flanked on all sides by the four most important buildings of the ShinRa headquarters. At this time of day it was usually full of cadets walking and chatting between classes.

_Of course...fifteen-hundred hours. The second-year cadets will have just gotten out of Tactics Class, which means - _

Sephiroth began to walk faster; he was able to cover ground this way as quickly as anyone else sprinting. He didn't run - doing so unnecessarily would have startled onlookers - and so knew he would not be able to intercept in time.

A blond cadet with spiky hair was standing on a wide rectangle of grass, talking with two classmates. Just as the human eye, upon surveying a scene, will focus on red-colored objects first, it cannot fail to notice - among a sea of people standing - the one who is running at top speed in its direction. Had this cadet not recognized the runner or had he perceived this intruder as a threat, his training would have led him to affect a fighting stance and assess the situation for battle. However, he recognized Commander Fair instantly, with whom there was just no arguing.

Cadets Lindley and Chang had the same few moments to make this assessment and react accordingly. Fortunately, they knew the procedure for these situations as well as they knew the drills for fire or aerial bombardment. When faced with a Zack Attack, there was only one thing to do - get away from Cadet Strife as quickly as possible, and this they proceeded to do, with seconds to spare. Cadet Strife also did the only thing he could do. He dropped everything he was holding, planted his feet firmly, and winced in preparation.

"Cloud! Cloud Cloud Cloud Cloud CLOUD!"

"Oh, Gaia," whispered Cloud.

"Oh, Gaia," groaned Sephiroth.

Cadet Strife closed his eyes instinctively as he was knocked off his feet and slammed onto his back on the mercifully soft ground. Commander Fair, SOLDIER's much-respected second-in-command, was cheerfully crushing him into a hug that their positions made slightly awkward, screeching like a child who's just been told that bed-time has been abolished.

"Hi, Zack," Cloud managed, once he got his wind back.

"Spiky! Didja miss me? Not as much as I missed you! But seriously, didja miss me?"

"Until about ten seconds ago, yes." But Cloud smiled, giving Zack a few more moments before he started to wiggle.

For the sake of the other SOLDIERs present, watching with either amusement or irritation, Sephiroth put on a stern expression as he approached the scene that had drawn everyone's attention. (No red in the immediate vicinity, though Cadet Strife's cheeks had flushed pink.) It was hard not to smile at the absurd sight, however. Cadets Lindley and Chang were each off to one side, standing rigidly and saluting the superior officer who was currently sprawled on top of one of their peers.

As Sephiroth reached the source of this amusement, the cadets turned to him and saluted again, both looking nervous.

"At ease. Commander, I must ask you not to ambush the cadets in public like this."

"I only ambush the one, sir. Do you think the others are jealous?"

"I don't, though perhaps we should ask them." Sephiroth looked at Cadet Lindley, who made a terrified squeaking noise.

"Zack," Cloud complained quietly.

The commander had gotten up to his knees, but now he was squeezing Cloud to his chest like a well-loved doll. Though very reticent by nature, Cloud knew that Zack was affectionate and had learned to cope with displays like this...it was just that everyone was staring. Cloud was lighter and smaller than most of the other cadets, true, but he was also at the head of his class by his own merit, and he didn't want anyone to think he had gotten there by being Zack's pet. Most of the time Zack understood and respected this - just not when he was excited and hyper.

"It's your own fault for being so squeezable," Zack said cheerfully. "Squeeze!"

"Zaaaack..."

"What? Oh, all them. What are you all looking at? Take a picture, why don't you?"

From the tight cocoon of Zack's arms, Cloud heard the unmistakable clicks of at least two cameras. He groaned and closed his eyes against Zack's shirt. Sephiroth didn't like to give the impression that his second-in-command needed to be corrected, especially while off-duty, but he did feel bad for the young victim.

"Commander, let the boy up. I can't have you scaring off my future SOLDIERs, even if they happen to be...what was it?"

"Squeezable!" Zack jumped up, pulling Cloud with him. He clasped the blond to his side for a moment more and then contented himself with loosely slinging an arm around his shoulders.

"Cadet Strife, correct?"

"Yes, sir, General."

Cloud straightened his posture so quickly that Zack's arm slipped off, and offered Sephiroth a perfect salute. He seemed nervous, but bravely looked back as the general observed him.

"Good form, Cadet. Zack, I believe this one could teach you a thing or two about decorum."

Several 1st and 2nd Class observers laughed or groaned in sympathy for Zack, who pouted for as long as he could before his good-natured grin took over.

"Hey, Spiky, did you hear that?"

"Thank you, General, sir," Cloud said quietly, averting his eyes.

"I believe the commander is finished making a scene," Sephiroth said, addressing the scattered mass of onlookers. "Cadets, get to your next class. SOLDIERs, feel free to assign laps to any you find dawdling."

The cadets dispersed quickly, practically fleeing the quad and in particular avoiding the 3rd Class SOLDIERs, for whom the disciplining of underlings was still a new and exciting privilege. Cloud tried to slink away with them, but Zack seemed to have taken the departure of their observers as a signal to resume his earlier clinging, and he was hugging Cloud hard enough to lift him off the ground, bouncing a little as he did so and jostling the cadet.

"I have so much to tell you!"

"Zack, Strife needs to get to his lesson, and I believe you have a report to attend to."

"Hey! You said Hopkins - "

"Hopkins is not in the habit of embarassing the cadets in front of their peers," Sephiroth said.

"Sir, um, it's...it's okay, I don't really mind," Cloud said with great difficulty, staring at his boots.

A cadet willing to speak openly to him (as long as he did so with respect) was worth much more to Sephiroth than an admonished and grumbling Zack, however well-behaved. The general smiled coolly.

"Very well, no report."

Zack grinned proudly and ruffled Cloud's soft spikes.

"Now you had better let the cadet go to class."

"Aw, he doesn't have to, does he? It's Materia Class, and he's better at magic than I am. I can excuse him, right?"

"Zack," Cloud whispered urgently, shrugging out of the hold. "I have to go."

"Commander." Sephiroth's voice, though unhurried and casual still, regained a hint of its usual force.

"Yes, sir." Zack picked up the book Cloud was reaching for and handed it to him. "I'll see you tonight, Spiky."

Cloud blushed again, glanced quickly back and forth between the two officers and saluted Sephiroth. "Okay. General, sir."

"Dismissed, Cadet. If you're late, tell Instructor Zane I excused you."

"Thank you, sir."

"You know, Commander," Sephiroth began as Cloud hurried off, "with displays like that, I'm surprised you haven't ostracized him completely. You should be careful, lest you give the impression that Strife requires your favor."

Zack shrugged. "Angeal protected me. It's not _that_ different, is it? Except that he wasn't a huggy kind of guy."

"Angeal protected you because I so often threatened to kill you."

"Eh, you'd never really do that."

"I assure you, I am quite capable."

Zack smiled teasingly. "Bunny-wunny."

_XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX_

True to his word, late that night found Zack Fair in the general's black silk-covered bed, gripping a pair of underwear in his teeth. Sephiroth, seated on top of him, was trying to retrieve the article of clothing and trying - with as little success - to look stern and unamused.

"I wish you wouldn't do that. I find it - "

"Irresistable?" Zack guessed through a mouthful of fabric.

"Disconcerting. What is this obsession with my underwear?"

"I'm jealous of it. Hey!"

Sephiroth had managed to fling the undergarment away, though he replaced it with his tongue, which effectively silenced any further complaints Zack might have made.

"Seph?" he said a few minutes later. "You don't really think I'm hurting Cloud, do you?"

"Aside from some occasional embarassment, I'd say no. His grades and skill speak for themselves and are, I think, above the suspicion of your interference. Of course, he might have an easier time with other cadets and officers if you made your affection for him a little less obvious."

"I guess I'm just not as good at pretending as _some_ people."

The sound of a keycard triggering the main door came from the front room, and the light sound of hurried footsteps followed.

"Finally," Sephiroth sighed. "A week is much, much too long."

The bedroom door opened and Cloud came into view, beaming at the sight that greeted him. He was barefoot already and continuing to undress as he made his way to the bed - much too slowly, in the opinion of the other two.

"What took you so long?" Zack cried, sitting up and reaching out.

"There were Turks hanging around the Main Quad. I had to go the long way to get here unnoticed."

"You see, Zack, Cloud could teach you a thing or two about decorum." Sephiroth watched Cloud intently as he finished undressing, feeling undone completely by the graceful sight and the smile that was still shy. "If you're not on this bed in three seconds you're getting taken on the floor."

"So much for decorum," Zack chuckled.

Both embarassed and exhilirated by the four eager eyes fixed on him, Cloud approached as slowly as he could, giggling when Sephiroth's arms yanked him off his feet and into the warm enclosure of skin and arms on all sides. His fingers happily traced the familiar curve of Sephiroth's back, and the general lowered his face into Cloud's hair and breathed in with a sigh of satisfaction. Zack, with an arm around each of them, traced the delicate shell of Cloud's ear with his tongue.

"No more missions, Seph," he paused to pant. "Another week without this will kill me."

"Hey, how do you think I felt?" the blond asked, snuggling against Sephiroth's chest. "At least you two were together."

"Mmm, it's not the same as when it's all three of us. Am I right?"

"You are." Sephiroth threaded his fingers into Zack's hair and pressed a trail of lingering kisses from Cloud's jaw down to his neck. "For one thing, Cloud is more respectful of my clothes."

"You're jealous of his underwear too, right, Spiky?"

"No..."

"Really?" the general murmured with a smile. "And why is that?"

Cloud moaned, his hands moving urgently over skin and silver hair. "Because I know that, given the choice, you'd rather have _us _in your lap."

Sephiroth growled softly and pinned the teenager to the bed, covering petite Cloud with a weight that was slightly more than Zack's, but no less welcome. The blond pulled him closer, trying to get as much of Sephiroth's skin against his as possible, and nuzzled the hand that caressed his face.

"That was the correct answer, Cadet."

"Hey, what about me?"

"Ha, ha, Zack's being punished," Cloud sang.

"You know, Spiky's the one who came up with 'Sephy-wephy'."

"Really?" Sephiroth pushed Zack down next to Cloud and hovered over them, smiling. "I suppose I'll have to punish both of you."

_XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX_

_The End...probably._

_Note: Written as a bribe for Zack, who's annoyed to not be getting any in "The Silence of the Chocobos". I think he'll shut up and cooperate now. :)_

_With thanks to Jade003, who sold me on this three-way pairing in the first place with "Just Another Oneshot"._

_And now, back to the chocobos, because I adore my reviewers!_


End file.
